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Welcome to I Am Not A Robot
Hannah Whittaker Komatsu is a mad woman with multiple flaws. When she wanted to start writing a blog to share her evolving understanding of her life, what she calls The Great Unfolding, she was very tempted to accept the possibility of an AI writing her blog. The potential that the writing would be better, less flawed, and more acceptable to readers was a strong invitation.
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But then she recalled her strong belief in authentic living. Her lived wisdom is that by being true to ourselves, even about our flaws, we step into the possibility of experiencing a deeper, more genuine connection with the world around us, particularly with other people also doing their best to navigate it. And so, ‘I am not a robot’ was born. Writing by a human. A flawed human.
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Within the content, you will find an array of lived experience storytelling. One friend described Hannah as a ‘messy sense-maker.’ Hannah, who has lived a very messy life and who credits among her flaws being messy, found it initially quite uncomfortable to be considered a messy sense-maker. Over time, however, she understood this was a reference to her ability to make sense of what others might call mess.
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The first mess Hannah has had to sense-make is that of her own flawed life. With more years in therapy than not, she has had the privilege of exploring the mess with trusted confidants. Attention was given to both, considering the mess that others contributed to or even made and that which Hannah created all on her own. She has learned that gems can be found by those who bravely dive into exploring the mess.
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‘I am not a robot’ shares some of these gems, with the hope that they may be useful to others on their sense-making journeys. She invites others to share the sense-making they find around their great unfolding and hopes that we may learn together how to build lives that are not just lived but are alive in all their flawed and courageous colour.
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Oh, but who is Hannah?
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Hannah lives in ÅŒtautahi Christchurch, on the beautiful lands of Kai Tahu. The descendant of settlers who came to Aotearoa, New Zealand, on the Charlotte Jane, she is also the descendant of two convicts sent to Australia who finally received a pardon to go to New Zealand to marry. As tangata Tiriti, she is doing her best to be a good ancestor.
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She is a mum to Liam, a daughter to Karen and Walter, and a very flawed wife to Hiroshi. She has two chihuahuas, both gifted with a yap from hell and carrying their own spirited flaws. She feels at home with them and grateful every day for their furry acceptance of her.
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She is a survivor of a variety of crappy things, including sexual violence, family violence, psychiatric service use, and spiritual abuse. All of those things contributed to her mess, but none of them defined her.
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Neither does the identity that she claims of being a mad woman. She lives with an internal collective, a committee of parts qualifying her as quite ‘mad’ to others. Being a woman is a complexity. For her, being born into a body with a uterus has facilitated a lot of the mess that she has had to work through. It has also been a body that has given her a great gift, that of her SUN, Liam.
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‘I am not a robot’ provides plenty of opportunity to get to know Hannah and her much flawed humanness. Do you dare to take a look?